Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Aren't kids great?

Kids have a great way of crushing the self esteem of those around them. I don't think they don't do it on purpose, they just don't have a filter and so are completely and brutally honest about everything. And I mean everything.

I feel like I am the target of my kids honesty most days - and it's most often about what I've made for dinner. My kids usually hate what I make for dinner. Even though most times they won't even take a bite to see if they really do hate it.  Here's a couple examples just from this last week.

I made what I thought was a really yummy salad to go with dinner. Apples, feta and candied pecans over lettuce with a balsamic vinegar dressing. I left the dressing on the side because I figured Kaden and Anise wouldn't like it that much. They both ate the apples no problem, but neither one of them would touch the feta (fair enough, it's a strong cheese and not everyone cares for it) or the candied pecans. Hello! sugar on nuts! why would you not like that?! Anyway, so I told them they both had to eat at least 1 nut just to try it. Because it's candy on a nut! So finally Kaden complies by slowly putting the pecan in his mouth with a look of terror on his face. Soon as it hits his mouth he starts to make gagging noises, and as he chews it becomes louder and he brings his hands to his throat and starts to fall over in his chair. Anise just flat out refused to eat one.

Example #2

I made nuts and bolts for a games night with friends. The next day Anise was standing at the counter eating the nuts and bolts as fast as she could, obviously really enjoying them. Our conversation went something like this:
Anise (as she is eating the nuts and bolts, insert loud chewing noises where appropriate) - "This is really yummy! I could eat this forever! Who brought it to our house?"
Me - "No one. I made it." 
Anise (as she puts the pretzel that was on it's way in her mouth back into the bowl) - "I don't like it"

Isn't that just wonderful? Seriously, what do my kids have against me? 

This next example is non food related. It happened over a month ago and my ego is still recovering. I debated whether I even wanted to share it, but I'm sure you will find it quite funny. 

It was mid-morning, Sean was at work and Maggie was having a nap. Kaden and Anise were playing nicely together in the toy room. I decided it was the perfect time to get my workout in. I get in my workout clothes, go downstairs get everything set up and get started. About 10 minutes in the kids come to find me. I tell them it's my time so go play and I will help them with whatever they need help with after - I hate it when I get in the middle of a workout and suddenly everyone needs something from me. Anyway, they say they just want to come and exercise with me. Fine. Just don't get in my space. So for the next 5 minutes or so they do their best to mimic the video, then announce they are tired of exercising. Relieved that they will go play now I say, OK go find something to do until I'm done. They reply, No we want to watch you. Oh joy. So the two of them plunk themselves down on the couch behind me to watch equipped with blankets and cups of water. I try to ignore the fact that I now have an audience, which was going perfectly well until I get to this one part in the video where you have to do one of those football drill runs - you know where you pretend to run really fast through tires. Anyway I start to hear giggles, and snickers and then all out laughs and suddenly Kaden can't hold it in any longer and he exclaims "Mommy, you look really funny when you do that! You look kind of like Mario when you run like that" Then Anise chimes in "Ya, and your bum wiggles funny" And that's when I firmly decided that no child is allowed in the same room as me while I am exercising ever again.